Needed: Culture change!

Increasingly in the past few months, there has been a lot of rumour about the roles of working mothers (as in paid work) and fathers:  politicians, employers,  society, doctors, families themselves, all have an opinion on the topic of women choosing (or wishing to have the freedom to choose) to work while raising a family, and possibly even progressing in their career while doing it.

Now, as a working mother I think I can speak for many of us when I say that managing family and work is a daily difficult balancing act. It is just challenging to squeeze your working day down to the nursery/nanny/schoolhours, to maximize every hour, to have endless to do lists for work, home and everything in between and last but not least, to make everyone happy, including yourself. Of course there are practical things you can do to help you through the week, housekeepers and the likes do help but at the end of the day no one can replace any of your roles as parent, spouse and professional.

On the work front, often the above challenges are matched with employers who have very little understanding of the well being as a whole of the individual and who have yet to understand that for all employees of all ranks there is no one-fits-all format for their personal success, development and for their productivity. A happy individual, who also thanks to his/her employer is able to achieve a good work-life balance, will be way more committed and successful in his/her job than an employee who suffers from lack of empathy and little understanding or flexibility. A very good example is given by the latest flexible policies wanted by Richard Branson for his companies. And latest in time the announcement of Vodafone of last week.

On the society front, there are also things that could help. Longer nursery and school opening hours, being able to share parental leave with your partner, enabling fathers to work flexibly without stigma, subsidizing childcare costs, allowing for longer/better paid maternity leaves and removing the equation motherhood plus  flexible working  equals end of a woman`scareer. This has been the case for too long now and I believe that the time for women to speak up has come. 

By promoting and implementing flexible working models , measuring performance not by the hours but by results and allowing families to make free choices when it comes to childcare and career, we can enable and retain in their jobs  many talented women and men, who will be, in different ways, able to fulfil their potential and to have a more balanced life, this in turn will increase productivity and decrease sick leave absences at work and have a positive economical impact on our society.

What`s not to like about it?          

M.

I am a rocket scientist AND a mother

A few months agoI was lucky enough to be invited to the annual Tages Anzeiger event `Frauen – neue Leader, neue Arbeitswelt`.

The topics discussed were extremely interesting and so were the contributions of many of the speakers invited.  One of the speakers in particular gave the most meaningful speech, and her words still resonate with me.

Prof. Dr. Kathrin Altwegg, from the University of Bern, is a rocket scientist.  That day she stood up on stage and told us proudly how she was the mother of three, two (grown up now) children, and one special child: Rosina as she called her. Rosetta is an ESA spacecraft, and it was launched on 2 March 2004 on a rocket, its aim was to reach a comet on 6 August 2014, becoming the first spacecraft to orbit a comet. Prof. Altwegg was responsible for the launch and the `mother` of the spacecraft.

In 2004 she was also the mother of two young children who went to school and came home for lunch. She needed flexibility and time for her children, all three of them. So she asked for that, in the form of a part time work arrangement, she asked to be able to work every day from 8 to 12, with the same responsibilities, and to be able to be home with her kids in the afternoon. The industry said no to her request. The boss of her boss said no. But her boss said yes. Thanks to him, Prof. Altwegg was able to retain her team and responsibilities, manage her family, and to be in charge of the launch of Rosetta. She also proudly told us that her best ideas were conceived when she was not working. When her mind was not fully under pressure. When she could count on a good life balance.

So why do we think that a 12-16-18 hours work day should be the norm to better perform? Why so many working mothers are asked to choose career versus family? How much are our careers really in our hands and how much in the hands of our line managers? Are part time or flexible workers really performing less just because they spend less physical time in the office?  Should they deserve less than traditional full time colleagues? It does not seem the case.

Here is an interesting TED talk (in German) by Prof. Altwegg.

Let`s make our voices heard and let`s not be afraid to ask. Prof. Altwegg docet.

M.

Double-career couples

Next to my job I have now for nearly three years worked with the women business network of my company, where together with a colleague,  while both heavily pregnant, we created a subgroup to this internal network, called moms@work. Under this hat we have run themed events (see post on the last event) and created an internal blog (latest post). A few months ago we were approached by an amazing young colleague who shares with us our passion for making the equation work-life balance work: for all and especially, for us parents. I would love to share here her post on her master thesis about work life balance for double-career couples and her thoughts. Thank you S.P. for your contribution!

`First, full disclosure: I’m not a mum. Still, I find the work-life balance topic extremely important and some years ago, while writing my master’s thesis, I did a great deal of research on the topic.

I still remember the pleasant conversations (passionate talks!) I had with the people I interviewed. At the time, I realized work-life balance is a hot topic for many of us and I’m now going to share with you a little bit more about what came out of my empirical study.

Double career couples are a reality in our modern society, which often suffers from a lack of time due to the extra work and responsibilities, now a normal part of modern life. In the last decades, many factors have affected the nature of today’s families and the needs of workers, who must be highly organized and manage their life both at work and with the family and still be effective everywhere.

The work-life balance is a challenge and requires a kind of personal adjustment of life's roles, which finally allows having a similar positive engagement in both work and private life. Three factors are generally considered in the assessment of the balance: time, commitment and satisfaction.

The presence of young children seems to be the most critical aspect to manage.

The work-life balance appears to be a common problem for women, who often suffer from a sense of guilt about the children if they cannot take care of them full-time. The cooperation of the spouse in the household and with the family responsibilities has emerged as essential in double career couples where both partners are busy on many levels and perform different roles. Mutual help and a meticulous organization are the key success factors in the management of the multiple challenges.

Long working hours, a poor working environment, domestic responsibilities and work obligations are considered to be the major sources of conflict and bring about the feeling of lack of time, pressures between roles, and incompatible roles behaviours. The effects are felt at different levels, such as health, family relationships, and work context.  The conflict for these couples assumes a bidirectional perspective, even if work still seems to have a major influence on the family.

For double-career couples, the major difficulty is time management and therefor the most desired solutions are flexibility in work schedules or a part-time job. Depending on the type of the job, flex time is not always possible, but generally companies seem to be open to allowing employees to arrange their schedules to better accommodate their family duties. A part-time job is still considered almost only by women and high responsibility positions often do not accept a participation less than 100% (it seems incompatible; but is it really the case?).

Not all employment sectors offer the same benefits, so women and men with maternity or family situations should investigate about the company policy (maternity and paternity leave and the possibility to extend it) during the application process, including the availability of childcare.

In the interest of employees, but also employers, these balance practices are in place to ensure the proper functioning of the system by enhancing the effectiveness of satisfied workers.

Have you found your balance?`

We look forward to hearing your experiences!

M. & S.P.

Navigating Work and Life with Ambassador LeVine

On the 7th of January I had the honour to welcome the United States Ambassador to Switzerland and Liechtenstein, Suzi LeVine as a guest speaker to one of the internal company events I help organizing (one more hobby for me :)

I had the pleasure to meet her a few months ago at an external conference and was impressed by her frank, thought-provoking and extremely interesting experience as a working mother and at times a stay at home mum. 

We had the chance to discuss a few hot topics related to parenthood and career when we first met and I realized she would make an excellent inspirational speaker.

One key point that was covered during the event and I wish to highlight is the role that parenthood should have in our careers. Parenthood - and the skills coming from it, empathy, problem solving, efficiency, you name it - should be considered as career enhancer as opposed to an obstacle.

Amb Suzi LeVine is very active on social media, after the event shared her impressions her blog: 

"Navigating Work & Life - a discussion w/UBS Moms@Work"

On Wednesday, I had the incredible honor of being invited to present to and have a conversation with the UBS Moms@Work group – an affinity group started by 2 amazing women – Manuela Andaloro and Ladina Jenal – who, while pregnant, wanted to have a more focused conversation around navigating work and life.  They invited me to share my own journey, experiences, struggles, and learnings.  What was extra special was that I was able to also bring my husband, Eric, to participate in the discussion. Since I’ve been an Ambassador – he has really stepped up to be the primary one focusing on our kids and our household (in addition to having his own business!) so his perspective was really valuable.

Within the event, I was able to share some perspectives on self-defining success (you can see a version of my presentation here) and then did a sit down question session with Mara Harvey – the executive sponsor for UBS Moms @ Work.  After that, we opened it up to the very attentive audience.

I felt that the conversation was fascinating, engaging, and thought-provoking.  I was moved by the candor, compassion, and motivation of the women and men who attended. Several of the questions have really been rolling around in my mind – but one, in particular, really struck me:

One of the attendees asked me to share thoughts on how to deal with those times when parenting impacts working hours – especially if those around you might not understand that impact.  This grew into a discussion on how to set boundaries, manage your manager, and to set expectation among those around you in terms of your availability.  It then evolved into a conversation on setting priorities.  A bunch of us got into the action on answering that one.  My husband joined in, Mara had some great comments, and then other members of the audience chimed in with their wisdom.

Net net – the thoughts were:

• YOU are the one who trains those around you and sets your boundaries of availability.  If you respond to emails at all hours, accept meeting requests outside of business hours, and such – then people will expect to be able to reach you/leverage your skills at those times.  IF – instead – you share that “I am very available during these times/days and will give you my very best during those times, but otherwise – unless there’s an emergency – I am not available and am really focused on my family/activity” – and then stick to that commitment.  Then those around you will know when they can/can’t reach you.  Personally – the approach that I try (although I’m still working on this one) has been to get home at a reasonable hour from work, spend quality time with the kids, and then do a bit more work before finishing for the day.
• Rocks, pebbles, sand: Mara shared this concept with the group that I thought was so beautiful (I have since looked it up online and found that it is a well-known metaphor.  The funny thing is – I’ve been living it, but just didn’t know the phrase).  She shared this experience from earlier in her career:

Something urgent came up at work – so the manager held a meeting at 7pm to address it.  At that evening meeting, when they went to schedule the follow-up meeting, he suggested 7pm the next night so as not to affect the next business day.  She suggested that, if it’s so urgent, then it should be prioritized into the regular working day.  The manager hadn’t even considered that, but appreciated the feedback.

The answer continued with a focus on how to prioritize – and that’s when Mara shared the metaphor.  If you put sand into a cup of water first, and then the pebbles and the rocks, you won’t get everything in.  But if you put the rocks in first, and then the pebbles and, lastly, the sand – the smaller items will fill in the gaps and you will be able to do all of them.  The same goes in life – start with the big priorities and then do the medium and then the smaller items.

• Multi-tasking is a special skill that parents develop as a survival technique.  As a parent – we look at creative ways to multi-task and leverage our time.  For example – in my former job at Microsoft, I would stack up my conference calls on Fridays so that, in the afternoon, I could bake bread for our Friday evenings while doing the conference calls.  OR – if someone needed to meet with me and it didn’t require I wear a suit, I’d ask them to bring their sneakers and do a walk with me while we discussed whatever it was we needed to discuss.

And that was just 1 of the questions that came up!

It is clear that there’s a real dialogue and progress happening – within UBS – AND also in the greater Swiss working world – for women who have children to choose whether or not to work for pay (I recognize that being a Mom can be, in and of itself, work – so I try to avoid the term “working mom” as I feel that’s redundant).

From my own experience in the United States I know that, even from my first pregnancy in 2002, conditions in the United States have improved greatly to enable that choice.  As someone who has made both choices – to go back to paid employment and then, separately, to stay home with my kids, It will be exciting to see what we can continue to learn from each other and do together over the coming years!`

M.

Simplify your life

The title of this post might be misleading. I am not inviting you to get rid of all the unnecessary items that clutter our lives (although that might require some attention too...) rather, I am often looking for ways to simplify and make our days more efficient (endless to do lists I have you in mind as I write this!) and I'd like to share some latest tips I have come across.

Have you already happend to hear of the `The 4 hour week` one of the New York Times best sellers? If you haven`t, I suggest to start by checking out its blog.

I found it an interesting read and while of course not everyone will be lucky enough to make millions while reducing their 40 plus hour week into a 4 hour week, there are certainly some good tips and useful suggestions in here that we could consider.

For example, how many hours a month do we spend to de-clutter our desks, at home and at work? We will talk about the physical clutter in a separate post, but what about all those emails, reservations, bills, planning that needs to be dealt with? For private home administration or for those of you who are their own boss, how much could we do with the help of an assistant?

What about trying to`outsource life` and use that extra bit of time in our hands for anything more pleasurable than dealing with paperwork and admin? 

The good news is, there is a lot of help at hand for a lot less than you might think. The not so good news is, where do I start from? The positive experience of the author was not enough for me so I did a little bit of digging around, asked for feedback on some of these companies that offer online assistants and the likes, and finally contacted a few and chose one.

`Brickwork` was my choice and can I say so far I can only agree with the positive feedback shared here. 

What did I choose to outsource? I made a list of tasks that fill my to do lists, split them in two, those that it would be a lot more of a hassle to outsource, and those that, after a proper introduction via a Skype call and detailed instructions via mail, could be monthly outsourced. Research for a few personal projects, holidays, updating files, sorting pictures, recurrent updating of websites, etc. 

Another name on my list is Guru, freeing up some time is appealing enough to give these companies a try!

M.